Humans one Verbascum nil

My eyes are streaming and I can cough as though I was a fifty a day smoker. But it’s a victory over the most pernicious weed on the property: the verbascum. Mullein. Strimmer’s revenge.

Here is what others call it: Mullein. Torches. Mullein Dock. Our Lady’s Flannel. Velvet Dock. Blanket Herb. Velvet Plant. Woollen. Rag Paper. Candlewick Plant. Wild Ice Leaf. Clown’s Lungwort. Bullock’s Lungwort. Aaron’s Rod. Jupiter’s Staff. Jacob’s Staff. Peter’s Staff. Shepherd’s Staff. Shepherd’s Clubs. Beggar’s Stalk. Golden Rod. Adam’s Flannel. Beggar’s Blanket. Clot. Cuddy’s Lungs. Duffle. Feltwort. Fluffweed. Hare’s Beard. Old Man’s Flannel. Hag’s Taper.

Clot Cuddy’s Lungs will do for me. Mine are aching from coughing. You can’t strim them as they are too thick. And when you thwack them they give off a cloud of white pollen that coat the stalk and flower spike. All you can do is get a thick pair of secateurs – loppers really. And cut them to the ground.

I was strimming away at the top terrace this evening, but had to stop at eight pm. It didn’t feel fair to pollute the valley with the whine of the strimmer at that late hour. But I really couldn’t start till after 630pm as it has been too hot today. But the slight evening breeze made it almost a pleasure. Until I found the verbascums.   So I downed strimmer and took my loppers and had a happy half hour doing all sorts of destructive things.   I have found a tree on the property that has suckered like mad. Or is it just a very successful seeding variety that has a high germination rate? We haven’t strimmed here for over a year.   And I wish I had been here earlier. It’s a charming part of the property. And I’ve even found a flat bit of land. Perfect spot for a little polytunne perhaps? Or just a place to perch and admire the view.   I have to sort out how to get the fence turned into a gate first. And get a set of steps up to it. But suddenly you feel anything is possible once you have stopped sneezing.

Right. I need to stick my head in a bucket. And get rid of these pollen infested clothes.